End of vacation and I started the last term of my studies. Soon, I would be a dental surgeon! Even though I was involved in so much studying, I started noticing some changes in my body. Things that should have arrived and hadn't. I told Axe: I know my body well and it is changing. I think I am pregnant. We agreed that the whirlwind of emotions we were experiencing from the study abroad applications and the stress with graduation could have affected it in some way. So, I waited 3 days, but nothing changed. I ran to search on the internet about the early features of pregnancy. I had not tested it yet; however, I went to the pharmacy and bought folic acid because I knew it was essential for the formation of the baby's brain at this early stage. Just in case, you know.
A few days later I ended up going to the doctor, who ordered a blood test to confirm or rule out pregnancy. Axe and I open the result together. Positive. At that moment there was a very important turning point in my life. While I was deconstructing myself, a mother was being constructed. However, the changes that I would face, both in my body and in my mind, would be something huge, and I was not even close to being prepared for that. I was confused, afraid, I had no money and no time for anything. I said to Axe: what do we do now? He then said, “whatever you decide, I am with you. You are a mature, intelligent, amazing woman, and I am by your side no matter what.” I had support from Axe, who I was in love with, and he was willing to live parenting with me. That was all I needed to hear.
But still, I was not planning a pregnancy at that moment. I felt a mix of emotions. A mixture of joy, sadness, companionship and solitude, and tons of responsibility bending over my shoulders. But still, I was not planning a pregnancy at that moment. I felt a mix of emotions. A mixture of joy, sadness, companionship and solitude, and tons of responsibility bending over my shoulders. I paid attention to every single change in my body, tried to control even my thoughts because I feared that my insecurity could affect the baby. Everything I did, from that moment on, was no longer just thinking about myself.
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